Carter Stevens Carter Stevens Presents P.O. Box 727 Pocono Summit, PA 18346

Re: Your article "Suckers" in S&M News, Vol. 4, No. 3 [SUBMITTED FOR PUBLICATION]

Carter, I really must congratulate you on your article, "Is there only one born per minute?" (S&M News, vol. 4, no. 3).

Dear Mr. Carson, (may I call you Phil?)
Thank you for your long letter in response to my editorial about Rusty Hayway and his (your) group. I am reprinting your letter in its entirety with my comments interspersed. You see although I am a prick I try to be a fair prick. So I will publish your response to my comments.

In the course of hiccuping forth your spew of bile against Rusty Haway and his attempts to start a national "safe, sane & consensual" BDSM organization, Autumn’s Season, you managed to offend Texans, Jews, New Yorkers, Californians, and indirectly, the National Leather Association. You have also managed to insinuate that anyone who is part of a BDSM "organization" outside the umbrella of the NLA is a cult member and, yes, a "sucker." It takes a lot of phlegm to cough up such a vicious, baseless attack on so many people. I have to admire your willingness to say publicly what’s on your mind, no matter what your diatribes may say about what kind of person you are.

My diatribes say I am a hard-nosed opinionated SOB but I’ve never tried to hide that fact. Anyone who buys this paper knows it soon enough and since we sell thousands of issues every month world wide somebody out there must like to hear what I think (even if its only to laugh at it.) I won’t apologize to any of the above listed groups except the NLA since my writing in no way was meant to be an unsolicited endorsement of their group. I only used the NLA as an example of a "real" or recognized BDSM group. I wasn’t trying to say anybody couldn’t form a little local group on their own or that ANY group wasn’t better than none. There are many BDSM groups out there, PEP is another group I would mention if I didn’t want their image tarnished by association with my recommendation as I have seemed to have done for NLA. As to phlegm, at 52 I’m lucky if that’s all I cough up during a tirade.

It so happens that I have been a member of a few recognized BDSM organizations across the nation, and the bulk of my experience in the national scene has been in California and Texas—the past and future homes of our Nation’s finest "nut cults." I am fortunate to have become friends with some of the National scene’s finest, most prominent individuals. I do not claim to live a lifestyle steeped in the Old Guard Leather traditions of San Francisco and the TriState Area, but I would hardly consider myself an inexperienced, "hapless scene member."
Notwithstanding my background and experience, it would appear from your article that I am worth nothing more than your scorn and derision. For you see, Carter, I am a member—a proud one—of Autumn’s Season.

Hell Phil, you could be worthy of my scorn and derision all on your own. You don’t need to join a special group for that. As to the "Old Guard Leather Traditions" you speak of, you seem to have the impression that I am in some way trying to uphold them. WRONG. To me any self-imposed set of silly "rules" is just as useless as another, and to me a hanky hanging out of a back pocket just means you’re ready to blow your nose quickly if the need arises. As to being a "proud" member of the Autumn’s Seasons, so what? There are a lot of members of the Rush Limbaugh fan club or people who voted for Ross Perot in Texas too. (Doesn’t say much for them either.)

You made a number of references to NLA membership. NLA is, without question, a fine organization and one that is very important to many of us. The problem is, in most of the chapters of which I’m aware (and in Houston in particular), the NLA membership is primarily gay male, with its roots in the Old Guard Leather traditions. (The biggest exception would be the Austin chapter, made up of "New Guard" leatherfolk ... darn those Texas nutcases...) Most new folks, who may not have a homophobia bone in their bodies, would nevertheless feel very uncomfortable turning to most NLA chapters for support. As for education, most NLA chapters (except for that dadgum Austin chapter again) don’t put a sharp focus on educating newer BDSM’ers on safe, sane, and consensual S/M play. Autumn’s Season has those things written into its charter; it’s what the group exists to do.

Again I am not hawking NLA’s wares. It is only one of many fine national resources available. And it matters not what is written into AS’s charter if the basic tool used to "teach" all this is some two bit manifesto written by some know nothing hack. (I’m not saying it is by the way. I haven’t read it. But I have read many of the "recommended" books on the subject and I have offered to have Mr. Hayway’s tome reviewed by independent sources, but more on that below)

Would it interest you to know that, of the 19 BDSM clubs to our knowledge in the State of Texas, Autumn’s Season is one of the three largest? One of the most active memberships? One of the most social? That it is the only BDSM club in Texas to host seminars in different cities on a continual basis?

I find that very interesting, since all the feed back on your organization I have received from people I know to be "well known" in the Texas scene all report to me they know nothing about Mr. Hayway or his qualifications to write a how to book on BDSM. Also, they have never seen a single article by him in any publication, have seen him play almost never at AS’s parties, but do admit the play parties are fun usually. The only thing I have been told about Mr. Hayway is that he is young (NOT something to be held against him), is ambitious (again not a minus) and owns a titty bar (something I could never hold against him since I’ve been in the porno business since before the beginning of time). The group I am told only exists as a viable entity in one or two cities at most. Although they claim to be in over a dozen places in their Internet posts. Besides I never belittled the group itself merely the concept of basing the entire group on a mandatory tome written by someone unheard of setting himself up as a leader. I don’t care if there are 2 members two hundred members or only 37+ members. It matters not if Autumn’s Seasons does good work, runs good parties, or has a soup kitchen for the poor. If it’s set up to run like a cult it’s a cult.

With regard to Autumn’s Season being a "bald faced scam," I would point out that a one-year membership to NLA costs $60 (and in many cases is well worth the price). Autumn’s Season asks for a $15 fee, for life. And the educational seminars are open to the public, at no additional charge. So, it is beyond me how you can rationally criticize Autumn’s Season as a bald-faced scam. (Or is your criticism a rational one?)

NO my reactions to AS were not rational but rather emotional. I love BDSM and when I see something I feel to be not quite what it seems I react viscerally. $15 bucks, $60 bucks, $160 bucks it makes no never mind. If it’s on the up and up with no strings attached like the NLA (OR OTHER NATIONAL GROUPS). It’s worth it. If it’s a way for one person to sell books and or T-shirts (sorry patches) it’s a scam. Does one cent of Mr. Hayway's percentage go to the membership? Or events or anything else for the benefit of the members or is this just a cleaver way to sell books?

Rusty Haway is trying to do something no one else has ever had the cojones to try before: start a nationwide BDSM support and educational network, from scratch, so that people who feel disenfranchised from other large BDSM (or just S/M) organizations have an outlet other than fantasy or cyber. Rusty is trying to do something for the advancement of everyone nationwide who is, or wants to be, part of a "safe, sane, and consensual" network of happy pervs. How is this, as you called it, a "single minded approach of a lone vision of BDSM"?

When you have to buy HIS vision of how it is "done" to belong. When you do it his way or not at all. When he stands up and says you must buy my book in order to be a "real" member of this little network of Robo pervs, YES you're damn tooting I call it a nut cult version of BDSM.

And, Carter, what have you done lately for the benefit of the national scene, other than waste newsprint (for which you earn a very nice profit)?

Not nearly nice enough and I never said my way is the ONLY way. I also run BDSM and "Spankers’ only" weekends. (On which I make a profit) I publish various magazines on various fetishes (FOOTPRINTS for Foot fetishists, SPANKS-A-LOT for spankers, etc.), (all of which I make a profit on), Produce a line of Fetish Videos (Ditto the profit) and star in many other fetish videos for other companies (for which I get less than handsomely paid but it is coin of the realm), and I am now developing an escorted tour of the European BDSM Hot spots for next year (which I will get at least a free trip to Europe myself out of I would hope). I do make many appearances at functions and fetish events around the country and on TV shows and do interviews for many books (I like my interview in Different Loving) for free, but those are for publicity so there is a materialistic bent to those as well. No, I have nothing against making money and if AS charged a flat fee to join even double what it does and gave out a suggested reading list (including this self-published bible of BDSM of Mr. Hayway) I probably wouldn’t say shit.

I must address your assertion that Autumn’s Season "smacks of Dianetics and Scientology." I fail to see the connection between our group and an organization that (1) recruits new members via the subterfuge of ...personality testing", (2) seduces them into adopting as their Gospel the vision of a bad science fiction writer, and (3) requires them to pony up substantial amounts of their personal wealth in order to achieve the next higher state of consciousness.

If you don’t see the connection don’t feel bad, the members of Scientology probably can’t see the flaws in the basis for their group existence either.

The only "smacking" I hear is the sound of you beating your head against the proverbial brick wall, trying to come up with as caustic an analogy as possible, regardless of how inappropriate it may be.

Well, maybe I’m wrong but not having read Mr. Hayway’s book for all I know that is exactly how he sees BDSM. If you didn’t like the Scientology analogy how about the Ross Perot analogy? Another Texas hot shot who thinks he has all the answers and is trying to foist his views on the gullible public via the media. Me, I haven’t any personal agenda as far as BDSM is concerned except to get as many nubile young females as are willing to submit to me joyfully. However I will sell them my newspaper and magazines first if they insist (I’m crazy, not stupid, or is it vice versa)

You have also indicated, by your offensive attack upon the entire concept of the Autumn’s Season network, that your intent to take the Autumn’s Season guide and "have an impartial person of national stature review it for correctness and validity" is a joke.

No joke. I would be glad to submit it to some well know figure in the national BDSM scene such as John Warren (author of The Loving Dominant), Jack Rinella, (author of The Master's Manual and Headmaster of the Master &slave Training Institute) or perhaps Adam or Gillian (editors and publishers of The sandmutpian Guardian). I am even willing to pay them for their unbiased reviews and I will print any or all of their reviews unedited as well as my own opinion (even if I like the book)

I sincerely doubt you would have anything nice to say about the book in any of your public fore,

Well, you’ve read the book and I haven’t so you would know more than I would what in it would be objectionable

because you would then be forced to admit how wrong you were.

Are you kidding, I’ve been wrong before and I will be wrong again. Hell, I’ve had my foot in my mouth so many times in public people think I’m deformed.

As I suggested to Rusty, why should he eat the cost of a book and send it to you, so you can get on your national soapbox and tell everybody how wrongheaded the concepts and suggestions in the book are? And must we depend on your arbitrary determination of who is "impartial" and of a "national stature"? I suspect we’d end up reading a review by none other than Carter Stevens.

See above.

The last time I checked, grammatical accuracy and spelling were not requirements for people who want to help further the acceptance of BDSM across the country. (In fact, it doesn’t even seem to be a requirement for publication of a national sex tabloid, based upon my review of your latest issue.) Instead of lambasting someone because of how they write, may I suggest that in the future you reserve your comments until you have looked beyond the spelling and punctuation and evaluated what they’ve said, and only then pass judgment—if, indeed, you have the right to pass judgment in the first place.

I "lambasted" only his attitude of "I’m too good to talk to you about this" and his wise ass "when will you grow up" type comments. His dismissal of my legitimate questions about his methods and motives were met with a "I will never respond to you again" dismissal. Well, I guess I’ve got his attention now so maybe we will get the answers to some of my questions.

When we discussed your editorial (I won’t insult legitimate journalists by calling it an "article")

NO you are right it was 100% opinion with a major section of AS written material thrown in to show where my conclusions were drawn from.

at a recent Autumn’s Season meeting, it was met with a great deal of laughing and shaking of heads. If your comments hadn’t been so absurd, they would have certainly been ignored. However, because you’ve attacked a few dozen friends of mine in a national publication -and knowing a thing or two about "responsible journalism" myself—I could not let your editorial go unchallenged. When I informed the group that I intended to write you in an effort to set the record straight, every single member present asked if they could also sign their names to this letter. The signatures are attached.

37 (what looked to be) valid signatures WERE attached.

If you still honestly feel we are a "cult," because we share a common vision of responsible SS&C play ... well, I’m sure readers nationwide whose vision of BDSM differs with yours will have some thoughts on the subject.

I still HAVE to think you are a cult like entity since your entire existence is based on an unread manifesto. One man’s, perhaps messianic, vision of the BDSM scene as he feels it should be. (Hell, maybe in person Rusty Hayway is more charming than he came across in e-mail, God knows I am) A true support group doesn’t sell its one true vision along with its charter. If AS want’s to really help the BDSM community to grow than drop this franchise buy my book, wear my patch and send me 10% of your money crap and become a truly supportive group dedicated to education OF ALL KINDS about the BDSM community. Put your damn book at the top of the suggested reading list if you will but let people choose what and where they want to learn about the scene. Teach, mentor, enlighten, and entertain but don’t preach. If you want people to buy your book write it better than all those other BDSM guides out there, don’t start telling people they HAVE to buy it in order to be part of the BDSM community.

As a result of your editorial, Carter, I’ve lost a great deal of respect for you and your opinions. But it’s nothing compared to the complete lack of respect you’ve shown toward so many people with this thoughtless commentary.

It may be stupid, it may be wrong, it may be annoying but it was NOT thoughtless. You might not like the thoughts expressed but if you don’t, you don’t have to buy my paper. Or better yet, write one of your own, then maybe you can start an organization and make buying your book mandatory, Oh, wait Rusty Hayway already did that didn’t he?

Let me suggest that in the future, you do more than post "Has anybody heard of this guy?" a couple of times in a Usenet newsgroup before launching your character assassination upon him.

He posted himself to an open forum so he made himself fair game. Asking for references is not unfair for someone who puts himself or herself up as an expert on a given subject. And the question was asked both publicly on the Internet and privately of people who are known to be prominent in the BDSM scene nationally. As to character assassination he did that himself with his attitude toward answering questions about his qualifications to write an expert text on a subject. And I’m sorry my New York Jew boy smart assed satirical style rankles you red neck shit kicker Texas nut cult types but hell I thought things had changed down there judging from Kinky Freedman and the Texas Jewboys but I guess I was wrong.

If this is how you wield your "power of the press," I shudder to think how you wield power over your submissives. I sure as hell hope you’re more responsible with them than you have been with us.

Unlike your Mr. Hayway I am more than willing to provide references. Both personal and professional.

Phil Carson

P.S.: The founder of McDonald’s was not "Roy Krok," it was RAY KROC. Fact-checking is part of responsible journalism, remember? Try it sometime.

Sorry Phil, this ain’t the New York Times. Don’t have a staff to check every one of my little diatribes. However if you got the analogy about McDonalds even with poor Mr. Kroc’s name misspelled how come the one for Scientology pissed you off so badly (or did I spell Dianetics correctly so it hit closer to home?) As to responsible journalism, Huh? This is a national smut magazine. I publish it and write what I damn well please. You don’t agree fine, buy some other wack off mag. I never claimed to be a responsible journalist. I’m an opinionated loud mouthed New York Jew boy who says what he thinks (and sometimes even spells it right) You want to lambaste me though out the BDSM community because I hurt your feelings… go ahead Hell, maybe more people will agree with you than me. So be it.